Short Term Failure is Part of The Path to Long Term Success.

A True Story

By Don Swartz

A couple of weeks ago at a mutual friend’s birthday party I reconnected with a former Masters swimmer from the 1970’s. Tom asked me what it was like coaching at this point in time vs. in the 60’s and 70’s. What had changed, if anything? I replied that some technique issues had been refined and racing strategies had been clarified to some extent. I said that belief systems still ruled the day when all was said and done. He asked me if the kids were any different. I said I thought there was less ability to connect the dots between responsibility and accountability. I also believe that parents are reluctant to allow their children to fail thereby robbing them of one of the great teaching experiences of all time.

He proceeded to tell me the story of his daughter Sydney (not her real name). A handful of years ago when she was 14 years old in 8^th grade she declared that she wanted to attend a local private school that is very exclusive. They only admit 85 students each year. Hundreds apply.

She decided that in addition to her outstanding grades, test scores and letters of recommendation from various folks that she would sweeten her chances by expanding her resume by competing in a speaking contest. She entered with the idea of being a finalist, maybe even winning and felt if she did this it would really help her chances of gaining a spot at this school.

She decided to reprise Doris Day’s role of Annie Oakley. She got her outfit together and practiced her lines for weeks. As the contest neared the excitement in the home began to build. Tom was extremely proud of her and she was growing more confident by the day.

The evening of the contest Tom and Sydney drove to Sonoma County where the contest was being held. She took the stage looking sharp; he stood in the wings, the proud parent. As she wowed the crowd and the judges he beamed.

Part way through, she stopped. She had momentarily forgotten her lines. She looked at him for help. He smiled encouragingly. Unable to remember she turned her back on the judges and audience, closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath. For nearly a minute she stood there motionless, and then looked at him asking for help. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled willing her to remember, to go on.

She took another deep breath and turned back to the audience. She said “I am unable to continue. I have forgotten my lines. I thank all of you for this opportunity and while I am disappointed in myself I can tell you I practiced hard and have done my best. Unfortunately today I cannot go forward.” With her head held high she walked down through the crowd and out the front door with Tom following closely behind.

They got in the car and she burst into tears, sobbing mightily. He comforted her as best he could. He had mixed feelings of course; he felt badly for her and proud of her at the same time.

The next morning as they ate breakfast together they reread the contest rules. There in the fine print at the bottom it stated that “no contestant shall be penalized for being prompted.” He felt extremely disappointed in himself for not reading the rules more carefully. She said it didn’t matter all that much that she had prepared as well as she could and it simply didn’t work for her that night.

Tom told me that it has been 5 years since the incident and several times over those years his daughter has told him that she learned more about success, perseverance, dignity under pressure, handling disappointment and keeping things in perspective from that one incident than she ever would have had she been able to complete her speech that night.

She was accepted into the school anyway. She decided not to attend. She is a freshman in college today, doing well.

Don Swartz is a Senior and Master’s coach at NorthBay Aquatics in Corte Madera, CA.  From 1970 to 1976 he coached several swimmers to Olympic, World Championship and Pan-American teams including several world record times. One of his swimmers, Rick DeMont, became, in 1973, the first person to break the 4 minute barrier in the 400 meter free while winning the World Championships in Belgrade, Yugoslavia.  Don was a Board member of the American Swim Coaches Association and a featured speaker at several World Clinics for ASCA. He was a coach on the 1975 World Championship staff and on the 1977 National team staff for the dual meets in East Germany and Russia.  In 1977, Don founded the Creative Performance Institute and for eight years specialized in teaching the mental side of the game to coaches and athletes. His workshops covered topics including: goal setting, risk taking, anxiety management and visualization. His clients included many high school, club and collegiate teams. He also worked internationally in Canada, Mexico, Venezuela, Sweden and Ireland.

Praise the talent or the effort?

BY DAN MCCARTHY//NATIONAL TEAM HIGH PERFORMANCE CONSULTANT

Last April, Carol Dweck, the author of the aforementioned study, spoke at the National Team Coaches Conference in Colorado Springs. According to Dweck, the way young athletes are praised can affect their mindset positively (called a growth mindset) or negatively (called a fixed mindset).

Parents and coaches can help develop a growth mindset by praising effort, tactics and persistence, instead of intelligence and natural physical prowess.

Fixed Mindset

Praising achievement can lead to behaviors that hinder development to full potential, even for those with true talent. Dweck feels as if the self-esteem movement of the 1990s, though well intentioned, actually crippled the self-esteem of children. Adolescents who were continually praised for “being so smart,” or congratulated for getting good grades, developed a fixed mindset. With a fixed mindset, children worry about making mistakes and putting forth effort as if it indicated low ability. They avoid struggling to solve test problems or spending extra time working on an athletic skill they have not mastered.

Growth Mindset

Praising children for how hard they worked to earn a grade, or the amount of effort they expended to finally execute a critical part of their race is much more productive for the long-term development. Students and athletes with a growth mindset learn to value the process and the learning experience and do not tie their self-worth to an exam score or a final result. Those with a growth mindset, Dweck feels, embrace labors and seek out counsel which will help them improve. Even when they fail, those with a growth mindset say they will study more or just work harder in the future.

Carol Dweck holds a doctorate in Social and Developmental Psychology and is a Professor at Stanford. For more information on how mindset affects the success of athletes please visit Dweck’s Web site.

For more tips from the National Team High Performance staff, visit the National Team High Performance Tips

Article from USASwimming.org

The Team Culture Aspect of "Success"

John Leonard

Think ahead to our end of season meets I would like to address both swimmers and parents about the team culture aspect of "success".

First, please understand that the coaches will be excited for the swimmers when they do well.  Also understand that the "more excited" parents and coaches get about a good swim, the "bigger deal" it will be, and the HARDER it is for the child to continue to get better.

So, the coaches comments and attitude will FOCUS on how to get faster the next time the child swims the event, (how to swim better.) and we'd ask parents to offer a "restrained" congrats. I know this is counter-intuitive to parents, but TOO MUCH praise acts as a brake on further improvement.

We want to foster the idea that IMPROVEMENT comes from attention to detail, swimming correctly, and following instructions.  "Well done, good swim" is a good parental comment.  "AWESOME, UNBELIEVEABLE, FANTASTIC" is NOT a good set of comments.  (Think about what those words MEAN.)

Also, we want to teach the children that joy over a good swim is a good thing.  But perspective and recognizing that they are hard working swimmers with good coaching, is more important.  NATURALLY they will improve!  If they practice well, and consistently, they will improve -- maybe not every time, but very often.  So the behavior of the athlete needs to follow the idea of "Act like you have been there before!"  (Instead of the showboating pro football player, who does dances and calls attention to himself for an ordinary tackle or run. They get paid millions of dollars to run or to tackle....they should be doggone good at it.  Just hand the ball to referee and get back in the huddle....)  Same in swimming.  Smile, shake hands with the swimmer next to you, go back and see the coach, accept a couple of congratulations and listen to the coach to learn how to continue to improve next time.  Two minutes after the race, forget it and start thinking through your next race.  And do EXACTLY the same after a less than satisfactory swim.

Be happy, celebrate, but be respectful of both your fellow competitors and the process of improvement.

Parents, please share this with your swimmers, either in writing or your own words.  Expect to hear the coaches explaining this to swimmers as well.

If the team culture is right, every swimmer will be "right".