OVER THE YEARS, I HAVE BEEN QUESTIONED QUITE OFTEN ABOUT COMPETITIVENESS . . .

By Geoff Brown, Head Coach NOVA Swimming

…mostly from parents who fret about their child’s seeming lack of burning fire. My answer has never wavered:

1. Competitiveness is learned
2. It emerges over time and strikes different children at different times.
3. Since it is learned, it can be taught or stimulated; since it can be taught, proper “gardening” can cause it to emerge.

Children with siblings near to them in age will often be competitive because they have spent a fair part of their lives competing for limited family resources (a favored seat in the car, for example). I strongly believe that self-reliance is a necessary precursor to competitiveness. Self-reliance blossoms in a garden of everyday tasks. For example, a child who is made to pack and carry his own swim bag will learn self-reliance; a child who learns to wake to an alarm is learning independence. The parent-assisted child often persists at the level of parent-assisted child, sometimes for a disconcerting length of time. A casualty here is problem-solving ability because this child’s solutions all too often come from somebody else.

Finally, failure is wonderful fuel for competitiveness. It is painful to watch any child fail but it is glorious to see that same child rise from failure, adopt new behaviors and succeed. It is difficult to see failure as the author of that new triumph but there it undeniably is. So failure is just a part of the competitive journey Hope this helps !!